Can't stand each other?
by mistyxtc
Summary: AU What would the students' lives be like if they all went to a normal public highschool in London and didn't do magic? HR, rated for language & small sexual references
1. Crisps

Hermione threw the empty packet of crisps at his annoying guilty face.

"Prick!" she shouted.

"Well you asked for a packet of crisps. I didn't know you meant with the crisps in it!" Ron answered, putting his arms in front of his face in a pitiful attempt to protect himself from Hermione's flailing arms.

"You knew exactly what I meant asshole!" she said as she calmed down slightly and sat with her arms crossed in front of the TV.

It was the day after the Halloween house party. Hermione didn't remember much about the night before. All she could remember was Ron disappearing in to some back room of the house and herself passing out on the couch she was currently sitting on. She had had way too many drinks and was experiencing the dreadful aftermath.

She'd woken up with a pounding headache and an empty stomach. Not having had the energy to search for food, she had conveniently asked Ron to get her a packet of crisps as he headed out to get some beer from the corner shop. She couldn't even begin to contemplate how he could drink so much but it seemed his only answer to a hangover was to drink some more.

Being the kind-hearted person that Hermione was, she'd even offered to pay for his drinks as well as her crisps. He'd quickly agreed to this and left for the store. However, on his way back, he'd gotten hungry and eaten her crisps, being the annoying prat that he was. At least he now had a few bruises to show for it.

"You know you're gonna have to pay me back, right?" Hermione muttered sulkily.

"Yeah, sure, whatever." Ron put his legs up on the coffee table, changed the TV channel and opened a can of beer, his eyes never leaving the TV screen, as though he hadn't even heard what she'd said. He could be so aggravating sometimes.

"Eeergh" Hermione growled as she got up and tried to push her way past his legs. "Move."

"Where you goin'?" He asked innocently looking up at her.

"To find bloody Lavender and ask where the hell she keeps her friggin' food around here. Now move your legs." Hermione gave his legs a slight slap. He playfully cringed and moved his legs. Hermione gave him an 'as if that hurt' look as she made her way through a couple of passed out people on the floor. She could've sworn she heard him chuckle when she was out of the room. She was still amazed to this day at how he could irritate her with such a small action. Nevertheless, she decided she'd be mature and ignore him, and instead try to find Lavender. She found her coming out of a bathroom with perfect skin and perfect hair. Hermione wandered how the hell she did that in the mornings.

Lavender was pulling back her long blonde hair into a perfect pony-tail when she noticed Hermione standing there.

"Hey Hermione. What's up?" Lavender asked, her perfect fake smile in position. Something that had to be understood about Lavender, and that was realised by the entire population of St. Christopher's Secondary School, was that Lavender had fancied Ron ever since year 10. This happened to be the year that Ron realised he wasn't a blabbering idiot when it came to girls, and found that acting confidant, pretending not to need any girl, and charming them with his humour was the key to getting girls. This didn't come to him straight away. In fact there was a transition period of about 3 months that Harry and Hermione will never forget, where Ron's unsuccessful chat-up lines would leave them two in hysterics.

Once Ron had finally mastered being the 'All-charismatic One' as Hermione had called him sarcastically, Lavender had wasted no time in letting all the girls in their year know to "back off".

However Lavender apparently thought Hermione had a thing for him as well. She was her "competition". Hermione was bewildered as to how someone could actually think she fancied Ron. They were constantly at each other's throats and Ron never ceased to be a dick to her. They'd known each other since forever, but that was only because they went to the same nursery when they were children and their parents had became friends. Even then, they used to steal each other's cookies from one another. In fact, the only things that had kept them together were Ron's little sister Ginny, who Hermione adored, and Harry, who was a mutual best friend.

At present, Hermione stood in front of Lavender and straightened up a little, showing her that she could be perfect too.

"Um…do you have any food around? Me and Ron are starving." She decided to stick his name in as well. That way she would've actually helped.

"Yeah, we store some junk food in the cupboard under the stairs."

"Cheers." Hermione stated flatly, smiling the smallest smile possible. She didn't like the girl and wasn't about to hide it. She walked through the corridor and opened the cupboard under the stairs. Everything she could hope for was there - chocolates and cookies and crisps and muffins and a load of other stuff. She found some chocolates in the shape of frogs that she found interesting. Hermione took as much as she could hold in her arms and made her way back to the TV room.

When she got back, Lavender was sitting on the couch next to Ron so there wasn't any space left on the small 2-seater couch for her to sit. Hermione dumped the junk food on the table (as far away from Ron's feet as she could), then sat on the floor and started watching Family Guy. When she turned around to get one of those chocolate frogs from the table, she saw Ron ogling at Lavender's rather large breasts…again. Lavender was doing absolutely nothing to stop it…again.

Hermione rolled her eyes and got up to try and find Ginny Even though Hermione loved that girl, she was never around when you really wanted to find her. Last time Hermione had seen her she was leaning over a toilet seat, throwing up.

Hermione checked the upstairs bathrooms and found Ginny fully clothed, in a bath half-filled with cold water, sleeping. Typical Ginny.


	2. Cold Water

Hermione leaned over Ginny, who was currently sleeping in a bathtub, and shook her shoulders.

"Ginny! Wake up!" she shouted at the heavy sleeper. It seemed to be a Weasley trait.

"I don't wanna go to school today Mummy!" she groaned, putting her arms over her eyes to block out the bathroom light.

"It's Sunday morning you idiot and I'm not your mum. Now wake up. You might catch pneumonia in the cold water."

"I'm up." Ginny mumbled, only to make herself more comfortable in the bath.

"That's it." Hermione declared as she turned on the cold tap and watched the water make contact with Ginny's face, who squealed and jumped out of the bath.

"What the hell's your problem!" Ginny shouted.

"You." Hermione stated as she handed a towel to her.

"Oh thanks." Ginny said sarcastically.

"You're welcome. Now come on. I wanna go home. I've already had enough of Ron and little miss Lavender."

"Why? What's my dim-witted older brother done now?"

"Nothing. It doesn't matter. Let's just go."

"Alright. Just give me a minute to dry off." Ginny wrapped the towel around herself. "Hermione?"

"What?"

"Watch out." She splashed a huge wallop of freezing water from the bath on her. Hermione now stood soaking through and through in the middle of the toilet, shivering already.

"What the hell was that for!" Hermione shouted through giggles. She couldn't figure out whether she was angry or found it funny.

"You woke me up in pretty much exactly the same way! Payback." Ginny said almost indignantly. She had a massive cheesy smile plastered on her face.

"Wipe that smile off your face. You look like Ron. Now give me a towel." Hermione replied flatly. However much she could make her voice sound cold, she couldn't help the amused smile that appeared on her face. Ginny handed her a towel and they both went downstairs to find some of their friends and go home.

As they headed down the spiralling staircase, they noticed Lavender shooing some random people out of her expensive home and Ron sitting on the couch watching football (a/n soccer for Americans).

"Ron, you seen Luna?" Ginny asked.

"Yeah she's sleeping in Lavender's room. Oh and don't bother looking for Dean and Parvati. They were off to one of the bedrooms together last night. And Seamus rode off on Lavender's bicycle in the middle of the night, wearing nothing but Lavender's mum's tight fluffy pink nightgown. He hasn't come back. I think he was drunk. I hope he was drunk." Ron replied looking slightly anxious.

Hermione and Ginny both burst into a fit of giggles at this small piece of news. Ron sat with an amused expression on his face as he imagined Seamus getting arrested by the police for cruising the streets of London on a stolen bicycle wearing a lady's stolen nightgown. He wandered how long they would keep someone in a cell for that or how much bail would cost.

"So I take it Dean and Parvati are back together. All right, I'll go get Luna and then we can go home. " Ginny stated, already moving up the stairs. Hermione went over and sat down on the couch, shivering and wet, not caring about leaving a wet print on it.

"The wet look looks great on you Mione. Especially while you're wearing that white T-shirt." Ron was unashamedly staring at her chest and grinning. Hermione looked down at her top and saw that it had gone see-through, giving Ron an open view of her lacy pink bra. She was also experiencing a bad case of the headlights due to the coldness of the water. Hermione quickly wrapped her towel around herself, trying to cover as much as possible with the small fabric. She could feel a small amount of heat rush to her cheeks but her embarrassment was quickly demolished when she noticed a small hardening in his trousers. A mischievous smirk overtook her face.

"Thanks but I have to say, you better watch where you're looking, otherwise Ron Junior there might get a little too excited, if you know what I mean?" Hermione retaliated, looking pointedly between his legs. Ron quickly picked up a cushion and put it on his lap, purposefully diverting his attention to the TV. Hermione could clearly see the tips of his ears go bright red. No matter how smooth the 'All-Charismatic One' had gotten, he was never able to get that small habit under control, although it happened much less these days. Hermione's lips curved into a small, satisfied smile. She was glad she was one of the few people left who could still embarrass Ron, the others being members of Ron's family and Harry.

At the thought of Harry, she felt a tinge of guilt. Even though it wasn't her fault his aunt and uncle were so hard on him, she still felt guilty at the fact that she was out enjoying herself while he was stuck at home. And what a home that was. The Dursleys took no trouble in letting Harry know every day of his life that he was not a member of their immediate family, and that he was only staying with them because they'd been gracious enough to let him once his parents died in that fateful car-crash.

Hermione could never truly understand why they were so cruel to him. She had looked in law books at school and yet wasn't able to find a reasonable provable case against the Dursleys. She assumed they were so malicious because Harry was so much smarter than Dudley and because of the aunt's feud with Harry's mum. Mrs. Potter had been much more popular during and after school than her sister and she had never forgiven her for that.

Hermione was brought back out of her trance when she heard shouting upstairs. She looked up at the ceiling. What sounded like Parvati and Dean's muffled voices told her straightaway that they were having another of their infamous break-ups. She would bet a public strip tease that they would get back together by tomorrow. They were always off one day and on the next. Hermione sighed and looked at Ron, who was still watching the football match on the television unblinkingly.

"You gonna come home with us lot or go home later?" Hermione asked him, wondering whether he would be able to drag himself away from the match just yet.

"Yeah I'll probably come with you lot, if I can get away from Lavender. She wants me to stay a bit later to help clean up. Don't ask me why. I've got no idea." Ron replied, looking bemused.

"You? Ronald Weasley? Clean up? Please…the girl can't be that deluded. She probably just wants another chance to throw herself at you. Why don't you just sleep with her and put us all out of our misery?" Hermione said coldly.

"Firstly I resent the fact that you think I'm not capable of cleaning up. And secondly, I'll bang her all in good time. Don't worry, she will be fully satisfied before the month is out, and then I'm sure all of 'you' will be put out of your misery. If you want it, I wouldn't even mind personally assisting to putting you fully out of your misery in my own special way." Ron had a triumphant grin on his face. Hermione looked at his very slappable face with a look of disgust placed firmly on hers. She was at a loss for words. She opened her mouth as if to say something but her mouth only opened and closed silently, trying pointlessly to form structured witty sentences, which made her look surprisingly like a fish. After a few moments of listening to Ron's husky chuckle, she couldn't take it anymore.

"Where the hell are Ginny and Luna!" Hermione screeched with frustration. Just then, Ginny and Luna came bounding down the stairs.


	3. Chicken Shop

A/N Thanks for your reviews guys, especially AshAnana coz I appreciate constructive criticism and her review now lets me say…

**PLZ READ…For anyone and everyone reading this story…this is an AU fic and the characters are quite different from the books coz they're how I imagine they'd be if they grew up in a non-magical environment in London Most changes in character will be explained along the way. E.g. Ron changed a lot in year 10 when he finally realised how to talk to girls… it worked but it got to his head and he became slightly too sure of himself when it came to girls.**

**Other explanations of character changes will hopefully be coming up…**

**On with the story…**

With the help of Ginny and Luna, Ron managed to sneak past Lavender without her noticing. Once they got outside, it was about six o' clock and the sky was already dark. Hermione looked at the long, empty suburb road and missed the constantly busy streets around her Central London home. She started to dread the long walk home but figured if she got started on it then, she might've gotten home in time to catch her mum before she left for work, to get some money. She still needed to buy herself some dinner.

She saw a bus stop half-way down the street. She could vaguely make out the number 13 on the small plate next to the bus stop indicating the number 13 bus would be arriving soon. She thanked god because that was one of only two buses that arrived close to her house.

"Laters guys." She said, giving a small wave.

"Aren't you coming with us to the chicken shop?" Luna asked, pulling her shoulder-length hair into a loose side pony-tail.

"Nah. Can't be bothered. Plus, I've got no money."

"Ohhhh….no no no no no. You are not gonna go home alone in _these _empty streets. I don't trust rich people." Ginny ordered matter-of-factly.

"I'll be fine. Ginny."

"No, you won't. Besides, Ron wanted to go home himself, didn'tcha?" Ginny smiled cheekily at Ron.

"You what?" He sounded almost ludicrous.

"Go on. You don't want Hermione getting kidnapped by some lonely truck driver now do you?" Ginny shoved Ron towards Hermione.

"Who says?" Ron moaned.

"We do. Now go already." Luna said, giving Ron another push.

Luna was definitely an oddball and received a lot of unwanted attention from her classmates at school. When she first arrived at St. Christopher's she didn't have anybody to call a friend but she'd gotten on Ginny's good side when she had told Draco Malfoy, the official bad-boy of their year to go suck on some turtles. This was of course after he had called her "Loony Luna". From this point onwards, Ginny had made sure that Luna received the positive appreciation she deserved for her strange and creative sense of humour. Hermione, Harry and Ron were soon to follow in Ginny's footsteps in befriending Luna. Ron's relationship with her however was slightly forced, as it was widely known that Luna had a rather bizarre soft spot for him and his blunt character, which was not greatly appreciated on his part.

"Ginny, Luna, seriously…thanks for your concern. You're true friends and all but I think I'd be safe from many different kinds of deaths is Ron _didn't_ come with me!" Hermione said, shoving Ron back towards the other two.

"Oi! Do you mind! Can you people stop using me as your personal human-size tennis ball!" Ron brushed off his hooded jacket as though brushing off invisible specks of dust.

"Both of you shut up and get over yourselves. Hermione, you'll be safer this way. Remember, there are still giant rats running around the city after that chemical waste leak in the Isle of Dogs. And Ron, you're going to go unless you want me to zap you with my 'Electrojoker'. They might say it doesn't really electrocute you but you know as well as I do that it's been proven to cause brain damage. Now go home before any of those rats come along." Luna said all this in a very serious tone. As well as having a bizarre soft spot for Ron, it was also widely known that Luna believed in the extremely bizarre articles her father wrote for his magazine, 'The Quibbler'. It was another factor in her long list of quirky traits.

"Took the words right out of my mouth, Luna. Well, maybe not exactly _right_ out of my mouth, but it was along the same lines." Ginny said, her face holding an amused grin directed at Luna. The two girls then began to continue their reasonably short walk to the Chicken Shop to their right. "Bye!" Ginny and Luna threw over their shoulder in a mocking sing-song voice. Much to their annoyance, Ron and Hermione distinctly heard it and knew they would not be able to stop the girls.

"Can you believe them!" Hermione screeched, throwing her arms into the air with frustration.

"Hey, you're the lucky one here. You get to walk home with me! What about me? Did they not put one single thought towards_ me_!"

"Would you shut up you self-centred, vain twat?" Hermione moaned, momentarily closing her eyes and taking in a deep breath to regain some energy for the long night ahead.

"Aaah. How sweet. I love you too Mione." He sniggered with a smirk upon his face.

Hermione rolled her eyes and groaned helplessly. This was not how she imagined she would be spending her journey home. She turned on her heels silently and made her way to the 13 bus stop. She could no longer stand this pointless bickering.

"Where you goin'?" Ron asked innocently, as he watched Hermione turn and head down the road.

"Where do you think?" She grumbled quietly.

"Huh?" Ron's face screwed up, looking dumbfounded. All he heard was a word that sounded like 'Whedoofin'.

"I said where do you think? To get home, I'll need to get a bus. And to get a bus, I'll need to get to a bus stop. Therefore, I am going to the bus stop." She made sure to pronounce every syllable, rather patronisingly.

"We._ We _need to get to the bus stop. If you hadn't noticed yet I'm stuck with you. And don't you patronise me, missy."

Hermione suddenly stopped on the pavement, a good five metres away from Ron and turned to look at him impatiently.

Ron, slightly taken aback, simply looked right back at her, a bit weary of her next move.

"Well are you going to keep me waiting for the next century or accompany me in walking to the bus stop, oh All-charismatic One?" Hermione drawled tiredly.

"Firstly, I would never keep you of all people waiting that long Mione. Secondly, I would love to accompany you. And thirdly, just for the record…I love it when you call me that." Ron grinned impishly as he walked towards Hermione. He relaxed again, knowing he was safe from another attack…at least for a little while.

When he reached Hermione, he looked down at her to find a small smile resting on her lips. Since entering their last year of secondary school, Ron had reached more than a foot taller than Hermione. Hermione didn't like the fact that he could now look down at her, as it no longer allowed her to easily stick her nose up in the air at him in a pompous manner.

"You know Ron, you will never cease to amaze me with your ego." Hermione stated matter-of-factly in a sweet and innocent tone of voice.

"I promise I will never cease to amaze you Mione." Ron grinned cheekily as he threw an arm over her shoulder, walking towards the bus stop.

Hermione laughed and gave him a playful punch.

"Ow! You're too aggressive, woman." Ron moaned. Hermione rolled her eyes at him and the two then continued silently on their way to the bus stop.

**A/N Soz it took so long to update guys….my dad cut off computer access for me for a week as punishment. Hmph! I'll try to make it quicker next time.**


	4. Bus ride

**A/N I know it's been a while since I updated…all I can say is…sorry. Hopefully you'll like this chapter.**

As the bus rolled to a stop in front of Hermione and Ron, they both got up from their seats at the bus stop and pulled out their bus passes. Hermione's of course, was authentic and legitimate, whereas Ron's was very much fake.

"Finally." Ron muttered, observing that the bus had been ten minutes late. Him and Hermione had spent the last fifteen minutes at the bus stop, bickering over yet another trivial point – the fact that Ron had not yet finished his Geography coursework due in two days time.

Once the conductor had allowed them on the bus, both teenagers made their way to the stairs and began to go up to the top deck. All the while Hermione was still muttering to Ron about his coursework, chastising him for leaving it so late. She was the first to reach the top and to her surprise found Viktor Krum sitting by himself in a corner back seat.

"Viktor? What are you doing here?" Hermione asked, with a slightly toothy smile on her face, Ron's annoying presence quickly slipping from her mind. Viktor was a very talented football player from Bulgaria. He had moved to Whitefield Secondary School in London for 6th form (his 12th year), due to the tragic deaths of his parents in a freak accident involving an unhinged Ferris Wheel, leaving him with no family and a huge desire to leave Bulgaria, where his memories remained.

Whitefield was a pretty shifty school and its students were what gave the school its reputation…but it could be said that Krum was a bit misunderstood. Being the star player of their football team and a young player for Arsenal, he drew a lot of attention to himself; however this attention wasn't always wanted. The media presented him as an arrogant and self-assured boy. This wasn't a very accurate representation. He had a much softer and more insecure side, which Hermione, being the smart one of the bunch, had been quick to pinpoint when Krum's team had visited St. Christopher's School for a match two years ago. Viktor Krum, who noticed her noticing, took interest in her and somewhat timidly, began to try his luck at making her like him rather than notice him. After all, who was he to reject attention from a pretty young lady such as Hermione?

Some time later, when Hermione arrived at the Christmas Ball with Krum, it came out in the open that Hermione and Krum had started a relationship. All of this was to Ron's great annoyance, and Krum, who had once held a place on his Most-Talented-And-Adored List, quickly moved to Ron's Get-Ready-To-Pounce List. In Ron's eyes, it was a betrayal for Hermione to be with someone who was in an opposing team to Harry's team in St. Christopher's; although, most people's opinion was that this was not the real reason Ron was so irritated and there was another reason lying beneath it all.

Due to Ron's constant bickering and pestering, Hermione finally gave in and called it quits with Krum. She wasn't the type of girl to ruin a friendship over a temporary relationship with a boy, however exasperating and infuriating that friendship might be. She and Krum ended peacefully and both decided to stay friends. However, as expected, they lost contact over time. Even after all this, she had never truly gotten over her first boyfriend.

While walking down the aisle on the bus, Hermione quickly glanced back only to find Ron rolling his eyes, and then narrowing them. She felt her anger rise but she forced herself to be calm, what with Viktor being there and everything. She settled for giving Ron one small glare and then turning her attention back on Viktor. Hermione quickly seated herself in front of him and turned her body so they were face-to-face. Ron went to the other side of the aisle and slumped into the seat by the window, looking frustrated.

"Uh…hi Her-my-own-ee. I was just at a friend's house. What you doing here?" Viktor asked in his thick Bulgarian accent.

"Oh we were just at some big Halloween house party thing." Hermione replied, not taking the huge smile off her face, and now absent-mindedly playing with a loose strand of her hair. She felt both giddy and slightly self-conscious at seeing him again. It had been a while.

"Was it good? I know the DJ who was there. He wasn't that excited…said it would just be some kids' stuff…that's bout it." Viktor said.

"Yeah well…you're right. It wasn't all that, was it Ron?" Hermione asked, trying to get Ron to join the conversation since she couldn't think of what to say next.

"Nah" was his abrupt answer, while he was still staring outside the steamed up window. Hermione was annoyed at Ron's rude behaviour in front of Viktor, not that it was any different to how he acted before. Thankfully, she didn't think he noticed since he started talking about something else. Hermione was glad that Viktor was a good talker because she was pretty much drawing a blank in conversation-starters.

Ten minutes into the conversation, Hermione thought she faintly heard Ron call her name, but she ignored it and carried on talking.

"Hermione. Granger!" Ron finally lost his already stretched patience.

"What!" Hermione yelped at finally hearing her surname, disgruntled by his tone of voice.

"We've gotta get off! It's our stop.". Hermione could see an angry red tint to the colour of his skin and ears.

"Alright! You could've just said." Hermione muttered the last part, while she got up and moved to stand behind Ron.

"I was trying! But you were too busy in your little conversation to even realise I called your bloody name!" Ron shouted over his shoulder while he was walking down the aisle towards the stairs.

"You know you should seriously think about getting yourself another girlfriend Ron. You're becoming really cranky!" Hermione shouted as they were walking down the stairs. Ron unexpectedly turned on her, becoming eye-to-eye with her.

"Well you should start getting out more rather than staying in all the time. Maybe you'd learn how to talk to guys without twirling a piece of hair around your fingers!" There was anger flowing out of his stare along with something else Hermione couldn't quite put her finger on.

"What's the matter Ron? Jealous?" Hermione retorted with a smirk. She obviously didn't believe it; she just wanted to say something that would get under his skin. There was a pause.

"Yeah and pigs can fly!" he said in a mocking voice. "As if I'd look at you like that! Sorry Hermione but you're too much of a bore for my taste."

"Oh yeah!"

"Yeah!" Ron stared intensely into her eyes for a good full minute. At this point, Hermione realised just how close their faces really were. She quickly snapped out of her trance and realised that the bus had just started to leave their stop. She caught the bus driver's eyes looking over through the mirror and told him rather harshly to stop the bus, anger still flaring through her. The bus halted to a stop and the double-doors opened. Hermione pushed past Ron and stormed out of the bus. She could hear his footsteps behind her all the way to her house but she tried her hardest to ignore them.

Once she finally reached her house, she slammed the door shut behind her, not looking back once. She couldn't understand why he'd just snapped. What the hell was wrong with him? She threw off her shoes, changed into her pyjamas and got into bed, when it finally dawned on her…it was only 8pm……and she hadn't said goodbye to Viktor.

"Bollocks."


End file.
